Many Hats Mommy

live the Power of One

The Minimalist Guide to Birthdays


Birthday Parties: Prime Place for Mom Guilt

Back in January I was browsing Pinterest to get ideas for Meatball’s superhero birthday party. While I did get some ideas to transform into my own, I was glad I wasn’t already having a bad day. There is so much out there to make us feel like less-than moms! So many gorgeous pictures of seemingly perfect birthday parties with elaborate decorations and an abundance of games, prizes, and treats.

Now, before some of you yell at me for saying that, yes, I know that some of those women love to be creative and their budget is bigger than mine. I know that some of them are amazingly talented and can do just about anything with craft supplies. I don’t begrudge them that.

However, I decided to do a series in March on birthday parties to help the rest of us–the ones who don’t have time or money to have a magazine-worthy birthday party and those of us who hate crafting or don’t have much creativity. Thus, I bring to you…

You, too, can overcome mom birthday party guilt! via

In this five-part birthday party series, I’ll be discussing:

  1. Overcoming mom birthday guilt
  2. Easy decorations & snacks
  3. Fun activities
  4. Off-site parties
  5. Inclusive parties

Let’s get started–birthday party guilt

Moms want the best for their kids. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Say no to pride, comparison, and discontent.

If I take a tough look at my mom-guilt, I think pride, comparison, and perhaps a bit of discontent are at the root. Ouch, that hurts.

Sometimes we let our pride get in the way a bit, even when we don’t intend to. We want to feel like Supermom and we want everyone else to see us that way. Let go of your pride and work with what you’ve got available. Some years the parties will be bigger than others. One year you may have hot dogs and another year a superhero feast for twenty. That’s ok.

We also need to let go of comparison. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. What you’re great at, one of those super-crafty moms is not so good at. She’s great at crafts, and you, well, not so much. It’s ok! Remember, God made us all unique. (Hmm…don’t we tell our kids that?)

Don’t let discontent ruin your birthday plans. Do you wish you had more money as you sniff a bit that you can’t provide the bounce house in the backyard at your child’s 5th year shindig? It’s ok. Take a moment of silence, then get over it. (I really do tell myself, “Get over it.”) When we wallow in what we don’t have, we tend to become not so nice to be around. You want your child to have fun at her party, not have a crabby momma who scares the guests away.

So, will you join me next Monday for easy decoration and snack ideas? Do you have your own thoughts on birthday party guilt, discontent, comparison, and pride? Do you think I’m crazy? I’d love to hear in the comments. Just tell me gently if you think I’m off my rocker. Thanks!

Author: Jenny Herman

Jenny Herman is not anyone special or a hero. She's just a working special needs homeschool mom who uses the Power of One to "just keep swimming". Visit her blog to learn more.

7 thoughts on “The Minimalist Guide to Birthdays

  1. Looking forward to the rest of this series. I’ve definitely see pride and comparison issues in mothers, but I think discontentment can easily take root in the children, too.

  2. I don’t think you’re off your rocker and I hope you don’t discount what I say because of who I am to you. I have always thought and told other people how good your birthday parties are. You are very creative with the simplest of things. I esp. like the “birthday tablecloth”. A birthday, although a big deal for your child as it shld. be; is only one day a year. When I see what you give to them 364 days; I’m blown away. YOU do it ALL for them. In the good weather you walk them both ways to the library(far, no car). I know moms who have a car and are too selfish to go. You LET them do their “experimenting”,”inventing” have a “laboratory”. You have taught them to cook and given them much joy to have their own cooking show and restaurant. Your teaching is way more creative than I ever knew teaching could be. YOU have taught them so much more and given them so much more than any crafty or pinterest mom could. SO THINK ABOUT ALL THOSE DAYS COMPARED TO ONE-WHICH YOU DO VERY GOOD ANYWAY.

  3. Pingback: The Minimalist Guide to Birthdays: Easy Decorations & Snacks | Many Hats Mommy

  4. Pingback: The Minimalist Guide to Birthdays: Fun Activities | Many Hats Mommy

  5. Pingback: The Minimalist Guide to Birthdays: Fun Activities -

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